You made me cry and you don't even care
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
that is very illegal...i love you.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
