belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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