he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
