i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
