Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
