you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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