that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize