do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
