yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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