Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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