Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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