So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
