Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
You are the jesus of drinking
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
