My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
