you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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