Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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