I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
