dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Randomize
