do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize