Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
