It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize
