you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
