we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize