Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I didn't shave. On purpose
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
