8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
