everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize