the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
