In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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