I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Randomize
