Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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