I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
