my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
