I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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