I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
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