i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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