i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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