If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Randomize
