Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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