Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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