He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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