i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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