well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
