dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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