I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
My vagina is very pro this idea
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