I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
