He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize