You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
