These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
