We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
