Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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